Carla read my post here and wrote in asking:

What do you do when as a result of finding out that you are a counselor, your church now wants you to provide counseling services to members of the congregation? Or the fact that you have taught classes at ministry events, and as a result some of the participants want to come see you?”

"Nice, Small Church" by Speediakal

How flattering!  But, here are 9 things that I consider before deciding whether or not to see members of my own church . . . .

1. Size matters.  I have found that it is difficult to be active in a church whose congregation numbers only 200 and still maintain my privacy.  That, in turn, colors my professional relationship with my client.  He knows more about me (and I know more him) than is always best.  If, on the other hand, my congregation numbers 1000, then it may be relatively easy for me to maintain my privacy and to minimize personal interactions outside of the counseling office.
2. I consider how I will handle it if I discover that my client is sexually or romantically involved with one of the leaders in my church (who happens to be married).  As far fetched as that may sound to you, it is not all that uncommon and it may very well change how you feel about your church home.  It did for me.  And, that’s before my client AND my church leader both wanted to vent to me, wanted me to choose sides, and then wanted me to publicly condone their behaviors to others!
3. I also consider how my own unforeseen weaknesses / foibles in my personal or church life (challenges in relationships, lapses in judgement, my own spiritual practices, etc.) might negatively impact my relationship with my client . . . .  Unanticipated exposure of those things can actually color what happens in my church and with my client.
4. I also consider the possibility that my partner / spouse / friend / child / sibling / parent may want to befriend my client.  That’s a mess in and of itself! And, what will I do if I believe (from my  clinical work) that the relationships with my client might not be good for my loved one?
5. I’ve had clients catch me before I could dash off from church services to “catch me up” on the latest chapter of their weekend disaster.  Do I want to do therapy in the parking lot?  Do I want to act disinterested?  Or, do I want to dread seeing that client every time I enter the church door?
6. I also have to consider if / how I am going to interact with my clients when I see them.  Am I going to speak to my clients when I see them at church?  Am I going to ignore them?  What if my new client sits down beside me on the pew?  Wants to hug me?  Asks me to take communion with her — or just “conveniently” times it so that it happens that way?
7. What if I sign up for a church dinner club and get assigned to the one that my client attends?  Am I going to explain to the host why I had to leave abruptly when my client showed up?  Am I just going to let the host think I’ve lost my mind?  (Yep, that’s exactly what I did as I ran out the back door.)
8. What if I agree to host a Bible study and my client shows up . . . or his wife . . . or someone who eventually becomes his spouse?  Am I really going to ask my client to leave because there’s a dual relationship if he stays?
9. Sometimes clients can be possessive of their therapists (and you won’t always know this ahead of time).  I’ve had Client A  show up “hurt” or mad at his therapy appointment because he had seen me talking to someone else at church.

OK, so I could go on and on . . . . My point is this . . . .  While much of this can make for great grist for the clinical work that you do with a client, do you really REALLY want to contaminate your personal life (and the lives of your loved ones), your spiritual home, and your professional life with this stuff?  Just think about it and, if you do, consult, consult, consult.

Can you think of other questions / situations / concerns to consider before jumping in to provide therapy within your own religious community?

Tags: Boundaries, Consultation, Ethics, Policies and Protocols, Reputation

In July, I talked with you about using professional online discussion lists to build your business.  Participating in online discussion groups that target your unique interests can also build your reputation and credibility.  Here’s an example . . . .  I am a member of a discussion list that focuses on women in Colorado who are in different aspects of the media business.  Because I responded to someone else’s inquiry about when to turn away business in this less-than-ideal economy, I ended up being quoted here in Drea Knufken’s blog, Business Pundit.  Twenty-four hours later, I was quoted here in Steve Tobak’s blog, The Corner Office.

"Smooth Peace 2" by Exper Giovanni Rubaltelli

If your marketing plan includes expanding your visibility or building your reputation in the community, here’s how to make that happen:

• Take some time to make a list of your unique interests . . . genealogy, bird watching, writing, football, etc.
• Google your interests along with the words “discussion list.”
• Check out what comes up.  If you find discussion lists that interest you, join them and share.
• If you don’t find a discussion list that fits your interests, then consider creating one of your own through Google Groups or Yahoo Groups.

Your interests do not need to be directly related to mental health (although they could be) in order to help you create greater visibility.  Once you become active in an online discussion list, your professional interests and expertise will gradually become known.  Like face-to-face networking, your online relationships will also take time and commitment from you in order to achieve the goals that you desire.

Give it a try! Then check back in here to let me know what you tried and how it’s working!

Related Post

Professional Online Discussion Lists Deserve Your Attention

Tags: Relationships, Reputation

I’m still reading Be a Shortcut: The Secret Fast Track To Business Success by Scott G. Halford.  Here are five more identifying characteristics that I’ve found:

"Hobbity" by Rakka

1. Shortcuts are resourceful and often rely on their relationship assets.
2. Shortcuts collaborate and negotiate rather than compete.
3. Shortcuts know that their networks wither without time, attention and care.
4. Shortcuts seek out new challenges.
5. Shortcuts are involved in continuous learning and take responsibility for their own personal and professional growth.  They do not rely on external motivation to learn new information or to develop new skills.

I live in a state that, I’m embarrassed to say, doesn’t require continuing education for the licensed professionals in the health care fields.  Because of that, I’m particularly aware how this last one – taking responsibility for continuous learning – really does set you apart as a shortcut.

Those of us who take the initiative to continue our education on a consistent basis really are the ones that develop a reputation as having a depth of knowledge in our respective fields.  We really are the ones that become the shortcuts.

Have you found an area yet that you can work on to build your reputation as a shortcut?

Tags: Continuous Learning, Health Care, Network, Reputation, Shortcuts